Dialogue and the Art of War — Part 5
The Subtlety of Subtext
In the last four issues of this e-zine, I talked about why dialogue is not like “real conversation”, about what makes good dialogue, about the importance of using dialogue tags, and about why Point of View is essential to great dialogue. I made the point repeatedly that dialogue is war.
Let’s remember that there are hot wars and there are cold wars. You don’t need bombs and bazookas to have a war. Sometimes war is a subtle thing, with spies and tea-time diplomacy and softly muted threats on the Red Line to Moscow.
In this issue, I’d like to talk about the use of subtlety in dialogue. In a word, I’d like to talk about Subtexting.
The message received is not always identical to the message sent. For two reasons: People don’t always say what they mean. People don’t always hear what they’re saying.
Let’s look at an example of this in the work of a master of subtexting — Jane Austen.
We’ll take a passage from PRIDE AND PREJUDICE. To summarize the story, our heroine Lizzy Bennett meets an eligible but extremely arrogant and wealthy young man, Mr. Darcy. They clash immediately, and Lizzy is sure he’s the last man on earth she’d ever want to be involved with. She treats him with such a bold impertinence that he is gradually attracted to her.
When he finally asks her to marry him, she rejects him flat out, causing a crisis in his life which teaches him to learn to control his pride. Meantime, Lizzy is learning from Darcy’s friends that he is quite a bit warmer on the inside than he is on the outside. When Lizzy learns that Darcy has paid a large amount of money to quell a scandal in her family, she realizes that she has seriously misjudged him. But neither he nor she seems able to break the interpersonal logjam between them. Until . . .
Darcy’s wealthy aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, hears rumors that Darcy wants to marry Lizzy. Lady Catherine is shocked and outraged, since she intends that her own daughter should marry Darcy. She assumes that these rumors were begun by Lizzie, based on her belief that Lizzie is like herself — willing to do anything in order to get what she wants. Lady C. immediately travels to Lizzie’s home in the country to confront her.
Lady Catherine completely lacks any tact or civility, and in the scene that follows, she says exactly what she thinks, never hearing her own message that Lizzie is no more than a worm to be squashed. Lizzie defends herself with calm politeness. The subtext of her message is that Lady Catherine is a complete idiot — which is true enough.
It’s a battle of wits between two strong personalities. Lizzie’s words are all politeness, but make no mistake — she returns every insult of Lady C.’s with compound interest. My commentary on the subtext will be shown in square brackets.
To the text, then, with Lady Catherine launching the first volley:
“You can be at no loss, Miss Bennett, to understand the reason of my journey hither. Your own heart, your own conscience, must tell you why I come.”
Elizabeth looked with unaffected astonishment.
“Indeed, you are mistaken, Madam. I have not been at all able to account for the honour of seeing you here.”
[Randy sez: Lizzie is perfectly polite here, but she feels no honor in seeing Lady C. here. The irony goes right over the Lady's head, however.]
“Miss Bennett,” replied her ladyship, in an angry tone, “you ought to know, that I am not to be trifled with. But however insincere you may choose to be, you shall not find me so. My character has ever been celebrated for its sincerity and frankness, and in a cause of such moment as this, I shall certainly not depart from it….”
[Randy sez: It's typical of Lady C. that she characterizes her own amazing rudeness as "sincerity and frankness". As we noted last month, everybody thinks they're the good guy. Lady C. interprets Lizzie's ignorance of the rumor as "insincerity" because she assumes Lizzie knows as much as she does.]
“… A report of a most alarming nature, reached me two days ago. I was told, that not only your sister was on the point of being most advantageously married, but that you, that Miss Elizabeth Bennet, would, in all likelihood, be soon afterwards united to my nephew, my own nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I know it must be a scandalous falsehood; though I would not injure him so much as to suppose the truth of it possible, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place, that I might make my sentiments known to you.”
“If you believed it impossible to be true,” said Elizabeth, colouring with astonishment and disdain, “I wonder you took the trouble of coming so far. What could your ladyship propose by it?”
[Randy sez: Touche, Lizzie! You've called her an idiot while affecting to be concerned for the trouble the lady has gone to.]
“At once to insist upon having such a report universally contradicted.”
“Your coming to Longbourn, to see me and my family,” said Elizabeth coolly, “will be rather a confirmation of it; if, indeed, such a report is in existence.”
“If! do you then pretend to be ignorant of it? Has it not been industriously circulated by yourselves? Do you not know that such a report is spread abroad?”
“I never heard that it was.”
[Randy sez: Lizzie has scored another point by noting the obvious fact that Lady C.'s visit will only fan the flames of this rumor. Again, her subtext is that Lady Catherine is a fool. Here, it feels like the two are reading from different scripts. Lady Catherine assumes Lizzie is behind the rumor. But Lizzie really has never heard of the rumor -- though she welcomes it.]
“And can you likewise declare, that there is no foundation for it?”
“I do not pretend to possess equal frankness with your ladyship. You may ask questions, which I shall choose not to answer.”
[Randy sez: The subtext of Lady C. is that Lizzie is so low-born that such a marriage is not even possible. This is an insult and is not true. Lizzie is the daughter of a gentleman and has the same social standing as Darcy, only less wealthy. Lizzie picks up the word "frankness" from Lady C. and with heavy irony uses it as a replacement for "rudeness".]
“This is not to be borne. Miss Bennett, I insist on being satisfied. Has he, has my nephew, made you an offer of marriage?”
“Your ladyship has declared it to be impossible.”
[Randy sez: Lizzie scores a direct hit. Only an idiot would ask if an impossible thing has occurred. But again, it's subtext. Lizzie politely reminds Lady Catherine of what she said earlier.]
“It ought to be so; it must be so, while he retains the use of his reason. But your arts and allurements may, in a moment of infatuation, have made him forget what he owes to himself and to all his family. You may have drawn him in.”
“If I have, I shall be the last person to confess it.”
[Randy sez: Lady C.'s subtext is, "Lizzie, you're just a slut who lured my poor nephew in." Lizzie's subtext is, "You're an idiot to think a slut would admit to such a thing." The ground is bloody here with subtexted insults. We skip the next couple of paragraphs to get to more subtext.]
“Let me be rightly understood. This match, to which you have the presumption to aspire, can never take place. No, never. Mr. Darcy is engaged to my daughter. Now what have you to say?”
“Only this; that if he is so, you can have no reason to suppose he will make an offer to me.”
[Randy sez: Again, Lady C.'s subtext is that Lizzie is a conniving little home-breaker. Lizzie's subtext is that Lady Catherine is irrational, since Darcy is an honorable man who would never make an offer to one woman while engaged to another. But Lizzie holds a high card here that she hasn't shown Lady Catherine. Darcy has already proposed to Lizzie some months earlier, and she rejected him then. So Lizzie knows that Darcy's "engagement" to Lady Catherine's daughter is no engagement at all.]
The scene goes on for a few more pages, but we’ll let it rest here. Lizzie has won this battle — decisively. Note how restrained her words have been. Lizzie does not need the F-word, the B-word, the A-word, or the S-word. She uses her wits and a forceful subtext to deflect the full frontal assault of Lady Catherine’s wrath.
The scene is all the more powerful for it.
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Award-winning novelist Randy Ingermanson, “The Snowflake Guy,” publishes the Advanced Fiction Writing E-zine, with more than 15,000 readers, every month. If you want to learn the craft and marketing of fiction, AND make your writing more valuable to editors, AND have FUN doing it, visit: http://www.AdvancedFictionWriting.com
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